You know, I’ve really enjoyed the last few days off.
I took a trip to the Dominican Republic this past week and when I got back I only spent just a couple of hours in the office catching up. A weekend off in youth ministry is rare, so I know to appreciate them when they arrive. Here’s a few recent thoughts about the dangers of always “being on” in youth ministry:
You’re only in problem-solving mode
You’re so busy solving other people’s problems you don’t think about your own issues. When the pace of life increases, we tend to focus on helping others, and not ourselves. Every message is applied to someone else’s situation, every learning is to be taught to another audience. One of the dangers of always being on is that until you turn it off you won’t look deeply into your own life. I wonder sometimes if busyness and others-focused-to-a-fault is to protect the real me from coming to the surface.You sacrifice those that matter most
Always being on robs from those you would be with if you were off. And while taking your son with you to an event is one thing … calling summer camp with your wife vacation is not. When you are always on as a pastor, you justify the need to do ministry and know those that love you the most will show you the most grace.You hold the ministry too tightly
If you’re always working, there’s nothing left to lead and no decisions to be made. When you’re gone or off, other people have to step up. Loosening the grip of leadership and control allows others to take responsibility. Ironically, the very thing you would say you need to help turn things off only happens when you let go.You begin to take shortcuts
In an effort to slow down the pace or at least pace yourself for the rest of the youth ministry “on” marathon – you’ve only got two options – well, 3, if you count death as one. 1) you can simply run faster. Dig deeper, work later and try harder and get it all done. Or, 2) you can take shortcuts. It starts with the small things to help you save time, but eventually spirals into spiritual and character issues. When you run hard and don’t stop, at some point you’ve got to try and stop the pain so you cut through no man’s land and hope you don’t get caught.You will eventually leave youth ministry
Here’s the endgame – if you don’t quit every once in a while, you will eventually quit altogether. Youth ministry can be a tireless machine of good in the life of students. It can be a tireless machine that chews up good youth workers, too. I’ve been doing youth ministry long enough to see so many leave this calling/profession. There’s a lot of good reasons to quit, you being irresponsible with your time and always being on is certainly not one of them.
So you have my permisson! Take some time OFF and get a break from always being ON. You’ll be better off for it, I promise.
JG
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Josh Griffin has been in youth ministry for 15+ years and serves as the High School Pastor at Saddleback Church. [
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Geoff Stewart serves the Jr / Sr High School Pastor at Peace Portal Alliance Church in Surrey B.C.
Hit from 5 different angles at once. Ouch.
This is something I’ve struggled with a lot, and continue to do so.
ditto.
Josh, I just returned from a two week vacation with my family. I have never taken two weeks before. It was awesome! Our group meets on Sunday nights so I missed two of those, a half a month. It was a fantastic break and thanks to a wonderful YM team I didn’t have to worry about a thing while gone.
I came back energized and refreshed and I’m seriously considering making this an annual event for my family. This year I’m at year 7 at our church, this means this year I get a sabbatical and I’m looking forward to that time although I’m not sure what I will do with the time.
The shameful part is that I know youth ministers that don’t get paid vacations because they are “part time”. So they never get a break and I personally feel the church is using them.
Yep…taking the next two days of to stay home with the fam. I’m crawling the walls right now..b/c I got a list of things to be done at the office. My wife is a teacher and is off for fall break the next two days…so I’m hanging with her…but…errr I’ll still be back for our Wednesday service.
Just curious if you feel the same is true for volunteer pastors (I myself am one)? Lately I’ve been struggling, not only personally with the question of “how much is too much?”, but also with the other volunteers that I help coordinate, and wondering how to find and encourage the right balance for them as well as myself.
When someone doesn’t have the job title to hold them in, it seems that it’s even easier for them to get disillusioned, or distracted, and to wander off. I’ve found that there are those who will naturately just throw themselves totally in the pit, and often burn out quickly… and then there are those who stay on the fringe, and never commit and also eventually leave. The sweet spot seems so elusive to find, much more so with volunteers than paid staff.
But at the same time as recognizing that “off time” is important, I’m also keenly aware of what I see in the trenches every week, that the most effective youth workers are those who develop trust and consistency with the kids. Our j-hi students respond best to the workers who they see week after week, so if we encouraged all our volunteers to “take regular time off” then it seems we might shoot ourselves in the foot.
Kyle,
With 52 weeks in the year would it really hurt for a volunteer to take a few weeks off? Our YM team serves every week but I know that they need time off for their vacation time or family issues. I have even encouraged the “overloaded” to take some time off. If the volunteer isn’t healthy is our youth ministry healthy?
JG — this is really good stuff. I think these are the main reasons why people burn out of ministry (not just youth ministry) in general — I think it could apply across the board! The leadership of the ministry needs to be an example and balance a schedule for the whole team in advance…and continually push their team to take time off…
Ditto to all–very good stuff. Keeping yourself NOT burned out is essential for youth ministry.
I totally agree with your points. I often struggle with the questions of: did I do enough, how much is enough, how can I do more, and how in the world did I do any of it!? I’m in a type of ministry where at least twice every year we all ( the church ministers) get together to simply recieve from God and not minister to others… and its kept me sane (at least i hope it has
). Keep up the great work and thanks for all the DR pics. I’ve worked there twice, once for 7 months, and was really blessed to see the great mpact and difference you all are making.
@Andy – no, of course it’s not a bad thing… and of course it’s healthier for them to do that then burn out.
I guess the point I was trying to make (and probably did badly!) is that the danger is when volunteers are a little too… shall we say… “flaky”. I think the unfortunate part is that the game of being a volunteer sort of sets up volunteers to sometimes fall off the map, because they feel like either they *have* to be there all the time (and so they quickly burn out) or they feel they don’t *need* to be there, and so they’re too easily willing to just not show up.
I think there’s danger on either end of that spectrum, in terms of health, not only of the individual but also of the ministry. And so I’ve found that navigating somewhere in the middle — where a volunteer is clearly encouraged at how valuable their consistent serving is, but is also reminded from time to time that youth group will go on fine if they need to take a week off — is much harder to do than it is to say or even to desire.
I myself (as a volunteer) have faced challenges in setting boundaries with my ministry, but as one who’s also in a position where I have to coordinate and lead other volunteers, I find it doubly hard to figure out how to communicate and strike that balance. Far too many times, I think I get it wrong, and sometimes great youth volunteers move on to other things as a result. I do trust it’s all in God’s plan, but I wish I knew better how to deal specifically with this challenging topic.