More Than Dodgeball | Youth Ministry Blog by Josh Griffin

Josh GriffinMore Posts Awesome Email to Parents from a Life Group Leader

Got this from one of our Life Group leaders and asked her for permission to post it as an example of incredible communication with parents. Wow!

Happy Friday Parents and Beauties!

Last Night
Last night we had our first meeting of 2012. We watched the YouTube video that has gone viral http://youtu.be/Q0p6lVdtGKI. We talked about why it is so powerful, and the girls then read the words and rapped their own version. We also talked about how we approach reading God’s word, and the importance of focusing on DEPTH, not distance (thank you Pastor Buddy). Many of the girls feel like they have so much on their plates with school and sports, that they don’t have time for reading God’s word. I have coached the girls to start small, just a few minutes before bed, reading God’s word for comfort and direction. Our current memory verse is Matthew 7:7.

My 2012 Intentions
We also talked about the importance of writing down your goals (intentions), so we used the attached document as template with scripture references for inspiration. I have encouraged the girls to take some quiet time to reflect on what they would like to achieve in their life this year with their faith, family, school and any other area of life that is important to them. We will share our intentions when we meet next on Wed. Feb. 1st.

We will not meet next week due to Finals.

HSM Life Group Covenant
We also reviewed our HSM Life Group Covenant. For those who couldn’t join us last night, please take out your HSM journals and review it. This year one of our primary goals in group will be to focus when we are studying and listen to each other and not talk when someone else is sharing. This is important to demonstrate respect for everyone.

Group Event Calendar
I have asked the girls to come with one idea and bring it to group on Feb. 1st so we can create our group calendar for the year. It can be an idea to serve, a fun outing, a unique way for us to connect & bond. I have encouraged them to think BIG!

Snack Schedule
Finally, I will send out a separate email with this year’s snack schedule, so everyone has a chance to contribute. Last night I made the girls smoothies with my new Vitamix machine and they asked for seconds! It’s my way of nurturing them with something healthy for their body and mind.

I am so grateful to serve, I welcome your feedback. April

Talk about ownership …. what a great youth pastor to these girls!

JG

Add Comment January 24, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts Casting Call for “It Takes a Village”

Got an interesting ask from the Oprah Winfrey Network that sounded like something that some of you may be interested in! They’re casting a new shot tenatively titled “It Takes a Village” and is a positive-change show aimed at helping one family each week by bringing together neighbors and strengthening community. Sounds great – here are some more details from the casting director:

The show will offer common sense solutions for typical family problems. Members of our casting team have worked on “Supernanny” and “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” and the show shares similar themes BUT the help is not monetary in the sense of a car or home; it’s more about relationship fixing and building — something we feel is far more important and valuable.

Each episode will feature a family with a teenage child, confronting challenges. Then we will rally the community to help, offer support and find solutions. The help will come from friends, family, neighbors and free services. At the end of the day, this show intends to create a greater sense of community and healing for the whole neighborhood.

You can contact Kamala at (424) 258-2203 to see if you/someone in your ministry might help work on the project!

JG

1 View Comments January 23, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts You Don’t Wish You Were Here

The old saying goes: The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. My mom always used to say that the grass is green over there because there was a septic tank underneath it.

But fewer words could be truer in Youth Ministry and church life for that matter. The grass always seems to be greener in someone else’s church. The advent of Facebook™ and Twitter™ you get to read about another youth worker’s work and how many students stood and received Christ for the first time, and how many dollars the group donated to a charity. It can feel like a non-stop highlight reel of comparison and discouragement compared to the situation you may be facing at the moment.

So I’m not surprised when people make comments about how great it would be to have my job, or to run a ministry like this. Truth be told, it’s a ministry just like yours, full of students who are hurting and broken and who make poor decisions regularly. When I spend time with students, it is often dealing with tough issues just like you. I usually Tweet about and post about the good, but truth be told, its tough, and the grass is not as green as you think. The same goes for the big youth group across town from you that has awesome music, great media and kids getting saved and baptized weekly. That is not the whole story.

Here is the honest truth; God has brought you to your church and your ministry for this moment. Don’t worry about what’s next or let your mind wander every day searching for. When your eyes and heart are on what others have, and what is happening down the road, you lose because you get discouraged, your students lose because you are distracted and say why bother and God loses because the person entrusted to lead Hid children is disheartened.

Here are two things to focus on:

Bloom where you’re planted
Just because you know that a ministry 3000 miles from you has great media, does not mean your students do. If you were to poll your students you will find that the thing that keeps them coming back is not an expensive youth room, free pizza, Xbox® Kinect™ or lasers – its relationships. Your students love coming to your group because they are known there, they matter there, and people care for them there, people pray for them there and people accept them there.

It may sometimes be a mess in your eyes, but you are called there, to share Jesus with your students, and it’s a blessing to be able to do that. Every church is messy. Accept the fact that pushy parents, apathetic teens and cranky facilities staff are a universal experience.

When you think about your group, think about the lives and stories that you have an opportunity to speak into and strive daily to show Jesus to each of them. We are blessed to work with a generation so hungry for significance and passionate about having a life that counts. They are just waiting for you to give them something / someone to live for.

Take a step forward today
Maybe you feel like you have nothing to add to the youth ministry landscape, when in fact you really do. There are thousands of youth pastors out there that are struggling, trying to figure out how to do ministry in a context just like yours. If you have been in youth ministry for more than two years, you have more to offer than you can imagine.

How can you share your experiences, good or bad so that other youth workers can benefit from it?

Start a blog

Write a guest post for someone else’s blog

Submit a magazine article (easier than you think)

Walk alongside a new Youth Worker in your area

Speak at your local training event

These are simple ways for you to share the lessons that God has taught you through being in the trenches. People need to know the pitfalls; they need to know how to deal with tough situations like the ones that you experience all the time.

Make the grass under your feet green.

JG

7 View Comments January 23, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts Youth Worker’s Bible Commentary

I’m excited to check out A Youth Worker’s Commentary on the Book of John – I love the idea of a Bible commentary specifically for youth workers and teenagers. Think I’m gonna pick it up – here’s the description from Simply Youth Ministry:

When a youth pastor is preparing a lesson, it’s sometimes challenging to find a curriculum that really offers depth into the Scripture passages and goes beyond a cursory look at the text.

A Youth Worker’s Commentary on John is the first in a new series of commentaries developed with youth workers in mind. An in-depth, yet readable approach to the gospel of John, this first volume includes commentary, word studies, personal and historical stories, and discussion questions that will help get students thinking and talking. The gospel of John is the most personal and revealing of all the portraits of Jesus in the New Testament.

This commentary has the entire NIV biblical text printed alongside a rich, deep look into the meaning of this gospel. Youth workers will find this to be an invaluable aid for message and lesson preparation. They’ll get a solid understanding of the gospel of John, including its historical context, rationale, and meaning, to see how to apply what they uncover to the needs and issues the teens in their group are dealing with.

JG

1 View Comments January 23, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts POLL: Youth Workers and Tattoos

When I was growing up – it wasn’t even close to OK to have a tattoo and be a youth worker. Things have changed a bit – and while I still don’t have any tattoos myself, some incredible youth workers around me do. How about you? Obviously opinions/positions are welcomed in the comments, too!

JG

5 View Comments January 23, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: 10 Ways to Keep Leaders Long Term

Youth leaders are vital to the success of your ministry. We all would admit that we cannot build a healthy student ministry without leaders! We all need leaders and volunteers no matter what size student ministry you may have. Here are my thoughts on ways to keep your youth workers on board with your vision and your ministry:

Build a healthy relationship with them- When you recruit youth workers, choose people who you can have a relationship with. One of the coolest things about our youth leaders is that most of my wife and I’s closest friends serve in our student ministry. So, we have some strong relationships with the ones who are in there! If you want to keep youth leaders long-term, you need to have a relationship with them.
Listen to their feedback- I came from a small church where we had 30 students and a few youth leaders that I personally recruited. I basically started the youth group from scratch and the Lord blessed. Then, He moved me to a different church with about 75 students and about 25 youth leaders. They knew the system way better than I did. One thing that I tried to do and still do is listen to their feedback and ideas. Some youth pastors have a way of doing things, and they are not open to ideas from their youth leaders. This is something that turns people away from serving in your ministry so listen to their feedback, and do not be afraid to use their idea and give them the credit!
Show them that they are appreciated. I am reading a book right now called, “life in student ministry” by Tim Schmoyer, and he constantly is hitting me hard about praising your youth leaders! This is a great way to keep youth leaders with you. They must feel like their ministry is important to you. They must know that you appreciate them. Try your best to pay for their ministry stuff. Our budget cannot handle paying for every youth leader for every event, but we try to cut cost for leaders and be a blessing to them. If we had the budget to pay for every leader, I for sure would take that and apply it! Shower your leaders with gifts and blessings. We just had our Christmas party, and we got each leader a Christmas photo of their entire small group. It was not too expensive, and it means a lot to our leaders. They must know that they are appreciated if they are going to serve with you long-term.
Your heart must be fleshed out- Volunteer youth leaders do not want to serve in your ministry if they cannot see that you genuinely have a heart for your students! They must see your heart, passion, and enthusiasm for this ministry lived out!
Cast vision regularly- Vision is not something that you cast once a year! This is something that the leaders need to be reminded about over and over again! They must hear where you feel God wants to take the youth group. You must cast is regularly, and you must live out the goals and vision that you are casting!
Train them- Leader training is so important. This is something that we are working on, but we are going to try to improve even more on. Your leaders need training. We always have areas that need improvement, and you need to provide this for your leaders. They also need to be humble enough to be willing to go through some training.
Pray with them- There is nothing better than having a relationship with your youth leaders where you can drop down and pray with them. You both need this relationship! Ask them how you can pray for them and their families! They need to be assured that you are praying for them outside of youth group.
Model their job description- Many times we have a job description for youth leaders that we as the youth pastor hardly hold! The youth leaders need to see you living out the Christian life as well as the job description and standard that you hold them too.
Let them lead- Many times youth pastors want to do things themselves. We are human, and we struggle with being on an inward power trip thinking that we can do things better than the youth leaders. If you give them a responsibility, allow them the authority to carry it out.
Support them- You must support them from the pulpit of your church as well as from the pulpit of your student ministry. They must know that they are supported by their student pastor. Support them in front of the students and take their side on issues unless it is a moral problem on their part. They must feel supported.

Josh Evans is the student pastor at Union Grove Baptist Church in the Winston Salem, NC area. He has been a mentor and pastor to students for 4 years. You can connect further with Josh on his blog or send him a direct email at joshhevans@gmail.com.

Add Comment January 22, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: It Could Happen To You

Last week I had the opportunity to sit down for lunch with the Youth Pastor whom I replaced after he was terminated after having an inappropriate relationship with a volunteer. I had not seen him in two and a half years since the week before his dismissal and it was a bit like seeing a ghost. Churches tend to make people in situations like that disappear under the guise of it being best for everyone. Truth be told I had not made any effort to see him, nor contact him until last week. Much of this lack of effort came out of my frustration with him for the harm it caused to our students, leaders and church. I was a volunteer leader in the ministry and have been journeying with our students through the process ever since.

As we sat down for lunch, I was encouraged to hear of the restoration process for him, working through the issues, for his family as they worked to build back what was lost. As we chatted I asked him, what advice he would give myself and other youth workers to avoid getting to the place that he did and here is what he said.

Don’t Give Your Students Everything: He did not have kids himself and in many ways him and his wife treated students and leaders as their own. Loved and cared for them, but what he realized is that he had given too much to the students, too much of himself, too much emotion, time and energy that his marriage and relationship at home got what little was left.

Protect Your Home: It’s so easy for your home to become a second ministry space where students can hang out. He said that making sure it was not youth room 2.0 and not prioritizing it as a family space first was a big mistake. The home is an intimate space, be mindful of that before allowing students especially of the opposite sex to be in your home when your spouse isn’t even if its in a group setting.

Keep Healthy Boundaries: He mentioned that in the midst of the relationship that ultimately ended his ministry he had kept very healthy boundaries with everyone else. He had noted the areas where there had been break downs in boundaries and made sure that they would not be repeated with others. Maintaining an open door policy in meeting with female students in the office, not meeting after hours or in private, not driving students alone were all areas where he had let his guard down and allowed for this to happen.

It Could Happen To You: This was the most powerful thing that came up in our conversation and it was a reality that I had come to recently, that anyone of us could end up there. At first I was so mad that he would do this, to his family, to the church, to the youth ministry that I had given 10 years of service to. But as I have moved into a ministry role myself, the reality is that each of us is a few poor choices away from being there too. For him it was little steps, letting firm boundaries become blurry, entering into an emotional relationship that eventually led to a physical one. When things are rough at home and people are showering you with affirmation and coveting your time at the church, it begins there.

He said it wasn’t until he was knee deep in the situation that he realized fully what had happened and that there was no way out, lying about it delayed his world crashing in for a short time. I often wondered how it went on so long, and he said he never thought it would just go away, but this held off the implosion that was to come for a season. He was a great Youth Pastor, loves Jesus, and never intended to throw away what he felt was his calling in life. Will he ever serve in ministry again? Not sure. But he is a constant reminder of how human we are, how sin can grab ahold of us, and how every day we have the opportunity to serve God in Youth Ministry and that we could just as easily throw it all away with a few poor choices.

Geoff Stewart is the Pastor of Jr & Sr High School for Journey Student Ministries at Peace Portal Alliance Church and regularly contributes GUEST POSTS to MTDB. Be sure to check out his Twitter stream for awesome ministry goodness. Want to get in on the fun and write up a guest post yourself? See how right here.

1 View Comments January 21, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts HSM Weekend in Review: Volume 167

Weekend Teaching Series: [re]THINK: Why Am I a Christian? (series finale, week 2 of 2)
Sermon in a Sentence: Some real reasons to be confident that Christianity is true and a challenge to know your faith.

Service Length: 89 minutes

Understandable Message: This weekend we brought in Brett Kunkle from Stand to Reason to help teach about the foundation for faith asking the most basic of question: why am I a Christian? Last weekend he took apart the poor reasons (used very commonly) as a defense of someone’s faith and pushed students to think critically about why they believe what they believe. It was a solid weekend that I’m praying causes students to challenge their faith now rather than lose it their freshman year of college. If you’re looking for a strong apologetics speaker, we’ve had great success with both Brett and Sean McDowell in the past.

Element of Fun/Positive Environment: This we played a fun game called Frog or Duck? based on a hilarious iPhone game called Animal Translate. We also played “I Love Mission” music video as a way to promote our You Own the Weekend series right after the church-wide campaign ends.

Music Playlist: Something in the Water, Oh Jesus, Avalanche, Forever, Divine and Holy

Up next: The Book: 40 Days in the Word (church-wide campaign begins, week 1 of 6)

1 View Comments January 20, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts 3 Keys to Longevity in Youth Ministry

Here’s a little of what I’ve learned now 15 years (and 1 week) into this journey of youth ministry longevity:

Hold some stuff sacred
If you want to be in youth ministry 5 years from now, you have to set some boundaries on your time and life. Do you take a day off every week? The occasional week-before-summer-camp can get overlooked but if you’re cheating too often you won’t last. How’s your family life? Having a long view of youth ministry means putting your family first. If you’re constantly telling your kids to wait or looking at your phone when you should be looking in their eyes then you have a problem. Your spouse is sacred. There is a connection between your faithfulness to your spouse and your faithfulness to God. Get some exercise this week. Care deeply about these things, and it’ll truly increase your chances of lasting in youth ministry.

Let some stuff go
Too often youth workers want to fight over things that don’t matter. We take on stand when we should be sitting down. We speak up when we should probably shut up. Over time, you’ll begin to understand what is truly worth fighting for … if you fight for everything, you’ll be too wounded to stay in the fight. Maybe take some time today to reflect on some things you’re holding on too tightly.

Surround yourself with the right people
Want to stay in youth ministry for the rest of your life? It isn’t going to be easy but having the right people in your life will make a huge difference. Get these 3 people right now: 1) a ministry cheerleader, 2) a ministry mentor and 3) someone who doesn’t know you work at a church. Who is cheering you on? Who is in the stands watching you and yelling encouragement? Who is the wise sage in your life nudging in his or her practical wisdom? Who do you get to hang with who know and cares nothing about your career. These people will be life-giving in the long haul.

Follow these principles to become a youth ministry lifer!

JG

4 View Comments January 19, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts Steak-Out Your Volunteers

We’ve done volunteer meetings lots of different ways from in person , to online, over Facebook™ but there is something about meeting face to face that is my favorite by far. When we meet with our team here is are some core values around our time meeting together.

Consistency: Commit to meeting regularly that that you can keep tabs on how your leaders are and what God is doing in their groups. Consistency is key to having leaders committing to be a part the meetings.

Prepared: Our volunteers give up a lot of time as it is, so when we ask them to come to an extra meeting, you better believe we are going to be prepared for it. I have heard of groups that send out an agenda with questions before hand so that any leader that misses the meeting can still provide feedback.

Eat Together: There is something awesome about breaking bread together and enjoying a meal with your team. We make a point to grill up some steaks with our volunteers. Our hope is that it conveys a small part of our appreciation for what they do.

Learn Together: Whether a training video, or some sort of short lesson leadership, having our whole team together is a great opportunity to learn to lead better together.

Discuss, pray: A part of every meeting is a chance to discuss issues and utilize the collective experience of the group for dealing with issues that students are dealing with. Every meeting also has a time where we can pray for one another as well our students and seek the Lord for guidance and protection for our team.

Hand out the calendar/resources: Each meeting we try and make sure that our team leaves with the tools they need to lead in the next coming weeks as well as an idea of what is coming down the pipe so they are not caught off guard by an event or change of program.

Value Their Time: The meetings are not longer than they need to be, as we know that our volunteers have family, friends and homework to take care of. We value their time that they give and take only what we need to have an effective meeting.