It’s Friday Insiders!
We are all afraid of something. For me, it’s when Andy Brazelton decides to creep by my desk. I am paranoid now. Thanks Andy.
Tim and Tasha Levert wrote an honest post about spiders and things you DON”T need to fear in your marriage. What are you afraid of?
I (Tim) am afraid of spiders. I was bitten by a brown recluse when I was in college, and I believe every spider since has been in training—just waiting to finish me off.
I (Tasha) can crush spiders. No fear here. I am, however, afraid of anything that can potentially lower my position on the food chain: snakes, sharks, alligators, moose… lions, tigers, and bears. You know…normal things.
As a couple, we also have fears, probably similar to your own. Healthy couples can’t escape fear, because we live in a broken world. But instead of running from fear, we can allow our fears to deepen our trust in God. In 1 John 4:18, the apostle tells us that God’s love “expels all fear” (NLT). The following are a few things that healthy couples may not like but need not fear:
Closeness—Healthy couples set solid boundaries, but they don’t build walls. Intimacy and closeness are shared freely, and trust has space to grow.
Conversations—Healthy couples aren’t afraid to have difficult, face-to-face conversations. They probably don’t like conflict, but they aren’t afraid of it. In fact, healthy couples have learned that taking the time to discuss tough topics will improve their marriage and bring them closer.
Counselors—Healthy couples don’t fear counselors. Marriage isn’t natural. Assuming that two innately selfish human beings are capable of spending the rest of their lives yielding to God and their spouse without help along the way is a silly notion. Healthy couples aren’t afraid to do whatever it takes keep their marriage vibrant, even if that means seeing a counselor.
On the outside looking in, healthy couples make marriage look easy, but if you ask them, you’ll find that’s simply not true. Healthy couples have invested in one another courageously, even in the face of their fears. We have a great marriage, but we’ve allowed seasoned couples, pastors, and counselors help us along the way.
When it comes to your marriage, what are you afraid of? Let today be the day that you allow God’s love to help you face your fears and improve your marriage. Be fearless.
Unless, you know… spiders show up.
Love you guys,
Tim and Tasha