burnout | More Than Dodgeball

Josh GriffinMore Posts Go + Go + Go = Burnout!

How many of these statements describe you?
• You pride yourself on working 50+ hours a week at the church.
• You frequently miss personal and family events and cancel plans with friends.
• You say, “Let me just finish this one thing” all the time.
• You check email after midnight and/or the second you wake up.
• Your kids have to holler at you—several times—to get you to look up from your laptop.

Believe me, this is a test you don’t want to ace. You need a break. You need to “go dark” once in a while. It’s not good to be “on” all the time. Two reasons we resist this are:

1. Unhealthy expectations. Often we don’t turn it off because our senior pastor or supervisor doesn’t let us—or at least that’s what we think. We assume overworking is a sign of good job performance, when it really drives us to a dangerous place and perpetuates unreasonable expectations. If you manage others, set an example by going home on time. If you’re job-hunting, inquire about typical work habits. And if you’re in a bad situation, get out or nudge the culture toward health.

2. Brokenness. It’s easy to fall into the trap of self-importance, even outright arrogance. Will the world really fall apart if you miss youth group one week? It feels nice to be noticed when you’re gone, but we take it too far. Pray that God will help you fight against personal insecurities and mold your heart into healthy balance.

There’s hope, but it starts with some tough changes. See below for a few tips for fighting back against unhealthy expectations and brokenness.

Go + Stop + Go = Health!
• First, pray for your heart and health.
• Start every day in time with God.
• Track your hours and see where you can gain back some time.
• Take a day off every week.
• Turn off email alerts on your day off.
• Don’t bring your laptop home.
• Limit the number of nights you’re away from home each week.
• Find a hobby that fills you up.
• Have a frank conversation with your boss about hours and expectations.
• Practice saying no.
• Schedule vacation time right now for the next two years.
• Invite accountability in this area.

Originally appeared in the Sept/Oct 2012 issue of Group Magazine. Don’t get the magazine yet? Hit this link to subscribe and get in on the action today!

Add Comment December 5, 2012

Geoff StewartMore Posts How Is Your Heart This Week?

I had such an incredible time at SYMC connecting with so many youth workers passionate about sharing Christ with the next generation. Of the countless people I connected with in Louisville there was one that stood out. He was a young ministry volunteer who was really excited about exploring the idea of going into vocational ministry one day and he was lucky enough to be brought to SYMC by the Pastor of the youth ministry he volunteered in. He was full of energy and a sense of calling to minister to High Schoolers and his gifting was obvious. I loved hearing his heart for students .

His Pastor on the other hand was another story… I asked if he was enjoying the conference and the he began to share is displeasure with many aspects of the conference especially how tired he was of some of the people teaching at it. He seemed so jaded and bitter toward many of aspects of Youth Ministry and the conference he had spent a lot of money to attend.

I had to ask myself, how does someone get to this place? Could my love and sense of calling turn into bitter resentment, could my desire to learn from educated experts turn into resentment by not being asked be one of them? Or worse, would my hard heart and frustrations become engrained in my ministry colleagues, volunteers and students and potentially taint their ministry experience?

It’s a really scary thought, so it begs the question. Where is your heart at this week?

Can I ask that together we guard are hearts from being hardened towards one another, to value the input that each of us can bring to the table from the unique contexts each of us are called to. We need to encourage one another and affirm what we see God doing through one another but also to honor those that have given their lives to equipping us as youth leaders. To honor those leaders who care deeply to equip leaders, not to make much of themselves but to make much of the Christ.

Take time this week to encourage someone on your team, a few of your students, your pastor, your mentor or maybe someone who has no idea the impact they have had on your life or ministry. We are all working to build the same Kingdom.

GS

Add Comment March 18, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: Youth Worker Burnout

Youth workers, both full-time and part-time, paid and volunteers, first-year and veteran can face many of the same struggles of ministry, one of the most worrisome is burnout. Burnout is typically characterized by emotional exhaustion, depersonalization, and a reduced sense of personal accomplishment. Consequences of burnout include impaired physical health, reduced job performance, negative communication with colleagues, declining professional commitment, reduced self-esteem, and poorer overall life satisfaction.

What burnout is NOT is being tired because of lack of sleep, getting frustrated at yourself or others because things did not go your way, or lack of self-control in confrontations (though all of these can feed into burnout). Youth workers face burnout through numerous avenues including inflexible work schedules, excessive control from your supervisor(s), conflict between personal and ministry needs, high expectations, and insufficient personal relationships or mentoring. In the end, we know that burnout results from the emotional demands of interacting with others and need to intentionally take time to tend to our own soul. Without a Holy Spirit within us and brothers and sisters in Christ surrounding us, we will never be able to fully meet the needs of those within the ministry we serve.

In the end, we know that burnout results from the emotional demands of interacting with others and need to intentionally take time to tend to our own soul.

In the next three days we will be looking at how to handle the stress that leads to burnout, what to do afterwards if we do suffer burnout, and how we can prevent putting ourselves in that situation. We will further address each of these this week, but here is a brief description of each of those topics:

Dealing With The Stress [read more]
Burnout begins with the demands and stress from work, home, personal goals, and sin, but ultimately it comes down to the excessive stressors. We need to know how to handle this stress by know what emotionally and physically wears you out, establish and keep strong boundaries from your work with your family and faith, and allow God to be the one who leads the ministry.

When The Flames Go Out [read more]
Burnout is our emotional and spiritual response to the excessive demands that we put on ourselves. We will look at three vital steps one must do in follow-up of burning out including taking time to stop and be with Jesus, identify what excessive stressors led to the burnout, and working with others in your organization and ministry to prevent those stressors from leading to another burnout.

Burnout Prevention [read more]
We need to take seriously the concept of burnout and take steps to prevent it. We will look at three different ways that Jesus tended to His soul from Mark 14:32-34 including the ability to recognize His troubled soul, He surrounded Himself with those He trusted, and He went to our heavenly Father in prayer.

Jeremy Smith is a 26-year old youth pastor at the Air Force Academy chapel, working for Club Beyond, and attending Denver Seminary for his Master”s of Arts in Counseling Ministries. He has been involved in Youth for Christ for eight years — check out his blog at Seventy8Productions.

Add Comment October 16, 2011

Josh GriffinMore Posts 4 Ways to Fight Fatigue in Youth Ministry

Was reading my friend Matt McGill’s blog earlier and he mentioned how he made a mistake because he was tired. We’ve all been there! Made me think of the ways youth workers need to fight fatigue in ministry. Here’s what I attempt to do:

Be refreshed by friends
Sometimes just the ticket you need is hanging with people (I supposed the opposite could be true for some personalities). Maybe there’s some friend who you could bounce your ideas and frustrations off of, or maybe there’s a friend outside of youth ministry that you could hang with and not even begin to approach talking shop. Either type of person you may need, make sure you carve out some time to spend with them.

Make the big decision that’s been draining you
Often times a game-changing or potentially painful decision sits right in front of you and robs you of your passion and energy. Make the call! You might be surprised at the freedom and renewed excitement you feel once you get that out of the way. If it is a tough conversation, pray about it and then have it. Tackle that energy-busting obstacle you’ve been putting off.

Do something fun
Youth ministry fatigue usually sets in when you aren’t getting enough rest or are all work and no play. So find an afternoon soon where you can get away for a few hours and relax.

Get away from it all
Sometimes there’s nothing you can do about feeling drained without just simple taking some time off. This week I’m nearly completely offline (any posts that you read on the blog have been set to post each day automatically) and spending time with the family. Fight fatigue with fun. Hit the beach. Go to Disneyland. Leave your laptop, turn off your phone and get away.

What do you do to fight fatigue?

JG

4 View Comments April 20, 2011

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: The Desire Deep Inside

I’m not sure I will ever be able to describe this feeling…

Francis Chan has been something of a distant mentor to me ever since reading Crazy Love for the first time nearly 4 or 5 years ago. I’ve followed his travels, listened to podcasts, and watched interviews all in the effort of trying to understand Jesus a little better as Francis portrays Him. I was at Passion 2010 when, during a breakout session, Francis detailed out the feelings, emotions and thoughts that went through his head and heart when he finally pleaded with his brother to begin to explore a relationship with Christ. He took us down the road the Paul went down as He, literally, bled for the Church that he had so passionately and fervently devoted his life to beginning and nurturing as the Holy Spirit led him.

Recently, I was sitting in my office after a Wednesday Night and could not help but know, very well, the heaviness that I felt in my heart. It was something that I could not describe with words, I would never be able to completely understand, and continued to be inexplicable for the duration of the week. The best I could come up with is the term that Francis used this past January, Holy Anguish.

My heart bleeds for the Church. Now, more than ever. I have always had a distinct desire to see change in the church, both older generations and the new, but it has been a very clear angst that has developed in my soul over the past year or so. Where I constantly see my heart leading me is toward the next generation. It’s not that I don’t think that the current generations in the church are unreachable or that they are not worthy of attention from the almighty Geoff Cocanower. But, God has placed inside of me a very obvious and distinct desire to see the next generation reach their potential, together, for the cause of Christ.

The point of this post is probably more for personal reflection than anything else. Which means it probably should have made it onto the pages of my moleskine instead of the pixels of my screen. However, I think that there is something inside each and every one of us that we cannot fully explain. Desires and passions to see a difference in something that we cannot completely comprehend and at times, when we truly allow it to take over, we are unable to avoid its pull on our heart and mind. We cannot begin to explain it or even come close to having people understand us for it. But we are incessantly consumed by it. It is the Holy Anguish that we feel for a certain group of people or a place or a longing that we feel but words can never do it justice, songs cannot describe it and, in the end, we are the only one that can truly understand the passion that we feel for it.

Bring this back to practicality. At some point, our lives must come to be shaped by this longing and this indescribable desire. Clearly, we are at our best when we are controlled and moved by the Spirit of God and we cannot truly be maneuvered by Him when we are pursuing the things that we want by avoiding the things that we desire. So the question becomes rather simple. What are you doing, right now, that is simply driven by the desire that is inside of you that forces you to lose sleep? And, What is it going to take for you to finally recognize that those things, the things that cause temporary insomnia, unintentional daydreaming, and immeasurable euphoria in your heart to take over your life and determine how you are go about your days and nights?

Geoff Cocanower is the senior high director of at Nappanee Missionary Church and blogs at
www.geoffcocanower.com.

1 View Comments November 21, 2010

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: Lessons I’ve Learned Losing My First Youth Ministry Job

When I graduated college a year and a half ago I was excited about where my life was heading. I had a diploma, a new marriage, and was about to start a full time youth ministry job at the church I had been interning at for the last year and a half of college. Many dreams were coming true all at once. Although we made financial sacrifices to be at this church, I was receiving some of the biggest paychecks in my 22 years of life and thought for sure we would make it work. Fast forward to now: I am still excited about what God is doing in my life, though it’s more about His presence than hitting life milestones. The road has been bumpy. Less than a year into my first youth ministry gig I was told I wasn’t what the church wanted for their youth ministry. It was a blow to my ego, my calling, my vocation, and my young family. My wife and I felt tossed aside by a church that we had devoted ourselves to for 3 years, the church we were married at, the church we called “home.” I’ve wrestled with a lot of things in the months since then, yet had incredible confidence in who God is and that He wasn’t done with us. These are some things I’ve learned as I’ve dealt with what happened and prepared for what’s next.

1. God’s plans are bigger than my dreams and nightmares. I knew I wanted to do youth ministry since I was a young teenager. I never had specific dreams of what that meant, but I imagined it looking like the church environments I knew. I didn’t picture California (being from the Midwest), the leaders and students I would work with, or the mentors I would have, but all of these things turned out better than I could have expected at my first position. I never imagined losing my first position so soon or that the circumstances of it would be so difficult- it was a lot more of nightmare than a dream- but I have seen God do amazing things through this experience that I never expected. I am thankful for the things God has done in my life beyond my dreams and in my nightmares.

2. The people in my life are “better than I deserve”. I steal this from a phrase Dave Ramsey says, but it characterizes the humility I feel towards all of the people who have supported me. I can’t say enough about how much my wife has meant to me, how she has loved me and challenged me to move forward in faith. We have been supported greatly by our families and the family of God. Friends and mentors have been there to walk with us. I know this time would have been much more devastating without these people God put in our lives.

3. Purposeful ministry has to be planned. I have learned a ton about ministry in the last few months from a lot of people and books. My head is filled with ideas that make me anxious to get back to youth ministry and let them out. From choosing and empowering leaders strategically to accomplishing all that the church is meant to be, it takes intentional work from the person in charge. Some aspects of ministry I could do with little thought, but valuable ministry comes from doing things on purpose with God honoring vision, leaders, and programs.

4. My life is filled with God’s grace. I think I have seen God’s hand in my life more in my recent experiences than any other time. These manifestations of God’s grace remind me how thankful I am to be walking through life following Him. The encouraging conversations with others, more part time jobs than I ever thought I could balance (FIVE at one point), sunrises driving at early hours to these jobs, better gas mileage than average, my wife getting a job on the last day of my severance, frozen pizza sales, and new experiences have all shown me God’s grace and encouraged me to keep walking forward with Him. I am thankful for the simple, complex, meaningful, and bizarre miracles of my daily life.

Losing my job was difficult, scary, and confusing. Walking through all of this with God has given me great peace throughout it. My wife and I have seen how blessed we are, and often say to each other that we love our life, even through this difficult time. God has provided for our marriage, our finances, and faith beyond what we could have expected — and this utter dependence on Him has humbled us as a couple. He has blessed us with incredible people to support us. He has grown me as a learner and taught me countless things. Best of all He has been present. I still don’t know when I will be back in youth ministry or even what the next few months look like, but I am excited for them and to see where God takes this adventure.

Mike Shaffer is an intern in social media at Saddleback Church and praying about his future in youth ministry. If you want to get in contact with him, here’s his email address. We had coffee this week and I asked him to write this post after hearing his story – proud of him and excited to see what God has next!

1 View Comments November 14, 2010

Josh GriffinMore Posts Saying Hello is Part of Youth Ministry

Tonight I had the strong urge to write a blog post about saying goodbye in youth ministry. It hit me because we’re going through it again – first Robby (leaving HSM to be a lead campus pastor for a regional Saddleback) and now Becka (leaving HSM at the end of a fantastic 2-year internship). I wanted to post to be about how saying goodbye is just part of the gig we’re called to, that we have team members, volunteers and graduating seniors that eventually leave our life and we have to be OK with that.

Then I did a quick search of the blog and realized that I already wrote that exact post just 2 months ago (Saying Goodbye is Part of Youth Ministry). So tonight, in my sorry of saying goodbye again, I wanted to focus on how saying “hello” is part of youth ministry, too:

Hello to incoming freshman
This is the time of year when freshman are coming into your high school ministry for the very first time. As your students go back to school and rubbing shoulders with their friends, expect some new faces to show up. Make it a point to seek out new freshman and be particularly welcoming them into your community.

Hello to great volunteers
The beginning of the school year is when new volunteers, particularly small group leaders, typically enter the ministry. Take the time to make them feel welcomed, trained and encouraged as they begin their time serving students. Your relational investments and the community you build could help keep them around for years.

Hello to great members of the staff
As hard as it is for us to say goodbye to great team members – even staff – it gives us a chance to see God putting the pieces together for what is next.

Every goodbye is a chance for a new hello. As you mourn the loss of a great senior class just a few months ago, pour into the new freshman. As you think about that long-time volunteer who finally steps away, remember the new team forming for the next season. And when you have to say goodbye to a great pastor on staff, remember God is about to introduce you to who He has next.

JG

2 View Comments September 7, 2010

Josh GriffinMore Posts POLL: How Many Days Off a Week Do You Get?

Poll question for the full-time youth workers out there – how many days do you take off a week? In my ministry context, we get Mondays. Curious about your schedule.

JG