Last week Group published their annual salary survey results for youth workers across the country. Don’t worry, they made sure that Kurt “money-bags” Johnston wasn’t included because it would have skewed things a lot higher (Josh, “I’m a little bitter” Griffin wrote that intro). The truth of the matter is most youth workers who are fortunate enough to get paid probably don’t get paid enough. And as a result, at some point you may feel the time has come to ask for a raise. Here are some thoughts on the subject:

Pray
It all starts with prayer. Take your requests to God and ask Him for guidance in what to say and how to prepare. It would be unwise to go into this challenging environment without having talked to God over a significant period of time. Ask Him for contentment no matter what the outcome. And while praying, ask God (and be okay with his answer) if your timing and motives are appropriate.

Get your facts straight
If you’re going to talk numbers, it is beyond important to make sure your numbers match up. What is average household income in your area? What do other youth workers in similar settings earn? On what merits does your church grant pay increases, and how are you meeting those?

Prep a few critical people
Be prepared for this meeting and take the time to prepare a few others, too! Chances are there is some sort of budget chairman or someone who acts as a treasurer or CFO in your church. Speak with them ahead of time to get an idea of the budget climate you’re heading into and give them a heads up on your plan. Having a few champions around the table can’t be a bad thing. And, “floating” the idea past an insider beforehand can be a great place to practice your presentation…and a great place to hear a potential voice of reason ahead of time.

Present the need
A great time to ask for a raise is when your lifestyle changes. Show them the needs of your growing family. Help them see the gap between what you make and what you need to make it work.

Show the opportunity
Connect the request to longevity. Offer a commitment of time if they give you a commitment of money. Show them what the future holds in your ministry and what you believe God will do.

Serve like you’re getting paid millions
Did you get the raise? No? It doesn’t matter. Drop the subject of money and give it over to God in your prayer time for this next season. Is He helping you prepare for a new direction? Is He teaching you contentment?

This isn’t going to be easy … so be strong and most importantly, be faithful.

NOTE: In complete honesty, this article was very difficult for us to write together. Kurt has never asked for a raise, and feels like God has blessed his family because of it. Josh has asked for a few raises during his youth ministry career and feels like God has blessed him for his willingness to put family first and make sure their needs are always met. Which is the best approach? It isn’t the approach that is “right” or “wrong”, but the attitude of our hearts.

This post was written by Josh Griffin and Kurt Johnston and originally appeared as part of Simply Youth Ministry Today free newsletter. Subscribe to SYM Today right here.

Got the chance to sit in on The Simply Youth Ministry Show this week with my friends Jake Rutenbar and Kurt Johnston. We had lots of random fun and actually did manage to actually talk about preparing a youth talk. Fun to be a guest on the old show!

JG

Our favorite time of the year is quickly approaching – the Simply Youth Ministry Conference is just around the corner. This March in Louisville we’re going to be hanging with 3,000 of our closest youth ministry friends. Hope you can join us! Even if you aren’t coming to SYMC, the chances are pretty good you will find yourself at some sort of conference in the future. Here are a few thoughts to make the most of your next youth ministry conference or training event:

Connect with people
Don’t be “that guy” (the guy who works way too hard to network, rub shoulders, etc.), but if you only use your time to catch a few workshops and sessions then you may be missing out on an opportunity to talk to some really insightful people.

Workshop presenters are insightful people, and are surprisingly open to the idea of sharing a coffee or a meal (especially if you schedule after they are done with their speaking schedule), but don’t make the mistake of thinking the “experts” are the only folks worth learning from! We could make a really strong argument that the best folks to rub shoulders with and get to know at a conference are the in-the-trenches men and women who have a story to share from last night’s youth group, not the one they led fifteen years ago (ouch….zinger!).

Ditch a session
This one stings to write as some of the people responsible for what happens during the general sessions. I’d (Josh) like to think that I create something so compelling you would never consider this! But time away from the church is precious and rare, a long dinner or conversation that shouldn’t end might be the best use of your time.

Inside tip: conferences kick off the conference right, if you’re gonna slip out of one, don’t miss the first big session for sure!

Sleep in late
You probably don’t sleep enough. Sleep in. You have our permission.

Get in early or stay an extra day
Arrive a day early, or stay an extra day to veg out a little bit. Your church (or in many cases, you) paid a lot to be there for the weekend – so take your time going home. Take a day to debrief, visit Disneyland or a spend time observing a youth ministry/leader you follow who lives in the area.

Be engaged
When Francis Chan speaks, everyone listens. Actually, many people can’t resist checking their email or texting funny observations to the youth pastor across the convention center instead of being fully engaged. Don’t quench the Spirit (just played that card) by sneaking looks at your cell phone.

Inside tip: don’t write off a speaker because you have never heard of them. Or because you have heard of them and don’t like what you’ve heard. Prepare to be surprised!

Hope to see you at SYMC in March!

This post was written by Josh Griffin and Kurt Johnston and originally appeared as part of Simply Youth Ministry Today free newsletter. Subscribe to SYM Today right here.

Kurt Johnston’s New Year’s Eve message from Saddleback Church on Vimeo.

Here’s part 2 of the video message from our New Year’s weekend adult services at Saddleback. Kurt Johnston, our Student Ministries pastor.

JG

We eat, sleep and drink youth ministry.

Every once in a while I (Kurt) will have somebody say to me something like, “Youth ministry is my life…I don’t know what I’d do without it!” To which I want to reply something like, “Gosh…I am so sorry to hear that!”

It makes sense that so many of us feel like our entire lives revolve around our role as a youth worker. Think about it: We love what we do, we are convinced in its importance, teenagers are high maintenance, parents are high maintenance, and church elders are high maintenance! We are typically under a ton of pressure for numerical and spiritual growth in our ministry, and many of us are so insecure we have somehow managed to find much of our identity and sense of value in our roles as youth workers. If you recognize yourself in any of what I just wrote, don’t be too hard on yourself…you are in good company!

For these very reasons, it is vital that you determine to have some sort of a life outside the church! Not sure what we mean? Here are a few suggestions:

Make friends outside the Christian bubble
As much as we need, and love, the connections with fellow believers, be sure you aren’t living in a weird little Christian bubble. It’s shocking that despite all the “missional youth ministry” language that is so popular, so few youth workers truly live a missional life. The reality is the longer you are a follower of Jesus, the fewer and fewer non-believing friends you tend to have, and the less and less time you tend to spend with them. Your circle, instead of increasing and becoming more inclusive, has a natural tendency to decrease and become less inclusive.

Enjoy your hobby
Spend some time enjoying what you enjoy. In the hectic pace of ministry you can lose sight of just “checking out” and having fun. For me (Josh) it is all about Call of Duty or trying not to accidentally crash my Air Hog into the community pool. For me (Kurt) it is all about dirt bikes or reading a good book. Find something you enjoy and do it. We encourage every youth worker to take their day off seriously – don’t sit at home working on that talk that needs finishing. Relax, refresh and re-energize by doing the things you love to do!

Take some extended time off
Building a life outside the church isn’t an easy task – especially if you are in a pretty deep rut. We’ve learned that a single day here and there usually won’t break the habits so many of us find ourselves in. If you have the freedom to do so, consider taking some extended time away from the church. Take back-to-back vacation weeks, escape for a 48 hour silent retreat, Call an old friend from high school and schedule a fishing trip or scrap-booking weekend (that one was Josh’s idea).

Do you eat sleep and drink youth ministry, too? Take a break today!

This post was written by Josh Griffin and Kurt Johnston and originally appeared as part of Simply Youth Ministry Today free newsletter. Subscribe to SYM Today right here.

There has been a lot of talk this year about the changing shape of youth ministry. As we wrap up one of our last articles of 2011, we thought it was a good idea to talk about a few of these changes … and point out a few things that don’t seem to be changing anytime soon. Up today, a few ways youth ministry seems to be evolving.

There are now many, many voices
It wasn’t that long ago that you would go to a youth worker training event or check out the youth ministry books online and see just a handful of resources by a handful of people. Today, youth ministry is rapidly expanding to include scores of voices from all sizes of churches and experiences. Thanks to the world of blogging, podcasts and Twitter, you can access the wisdom and experience of countless of youth workers with the click of a mouse or a push of a button on your cell phone while sitting at a red light (wait, is that even legal anymore?). There is room for your voice, too! The best voices are from the trenches of day-to-day youth ministry – so blog, tweet and podcast away!

Emphasis on parent ministry
Youth ministry is no longer just about students (actually, it has never been just about students, but we are finally waking up to this reality), it is about reaching, equipping and empowering parents to be the primary discipler of their teenager.

Team-based ministry
Youth ministry was never meant to be done alone! One of the radical shifts still gaining steam is the networking and collaboration of youth ministries worldwide. Everyone is beginning to understand the value of sharing resources and pooling our creativity to inspire others and share the timeless message of Christ.

Church together
Youth ministry is no longer an island to itself. Churches and youth ministries are actively seeking out ways to serve together, worship together and learn together. By all means there is still plenty of room for age specific, segregated ministry to happen, but connecting adults and students together in healthy spiritual mentoring relationships is a needed and welcome change.

What else do you see shifting in youth ministry right now?

This post was written by Josh Griffin and Kurt Johnston and originally appeared as part of Simply Youth Ministry Today free newsletter. Subscribe to SYM Today right here.

One of the critical skills of a youth worker is time management. The wise old saying is true – if you don’t manage your time it will manage you. We’re actually not even sure if that is an old saying or not, but we heard it somewhere, and it makes sense! We’ve also heard youth workers (ourselves included) lament about their lack of time management skills. Because it’s an important skill, and because most of us aren’t very good at it, we thoughts we’d share a few basic tips to help you out:

Write stuff down
Ah, the power of technology! You can use Microsoft Outlook, iCal or Google to help you schedule your life. They sync your computer with your phone and can even be shared with a spouse or church secretary so everyone can be in the loop on what you’re up to. Not into technology? Pick up a Moleskin notebook or Day Planner and physically write things down if you would like. The point is time management starts when we start trying to remember everything and we start writing stuff down! As the great time managers, En Vogue, would say: “Free your mind, and the rest will follow.”

Manage your meetings
When someone asks for your time, it is helpful to get an idea of what the conversation is going to be about so you can be prepared for how long it will take. Don’t assume meetings need to be a full hour (like Outlook, etc all do by default). Instead, get in the habit of scheduling meetings that vary based on the specific need. Be generous with your time, it is a valuable gift to give someone else. At the same time, don’t be afraid keep meetings on track and timely.

Make meals matter
One of the best opportunities you have in your schedule is lunch! You have to eat – and so do the people you want to meet with or want to meet with you. If you’re looking to meet with a mentor or ask for time with your senior pastor or supervisor, get them to food and chances are it’ll help you get to them!

Be OK with a day that got away from you
Recently we have both had days that got away from us. At dinner that night, or even later in the evening, you ask yourself “what did I accomplish today?” and you can’t really put your finger on anything significant. These kind of days are part of youth ministry, and will never be completely eliminated. Managing your time and schedule is important, but make sure that you are listening to God’s leading and asking Him to show you who needs His love through you today.

What are other best practices to help manage your time? We’ll be back tomorrow with our favorite tools that may be helpful for you, too!

This post was written by Josh Griffin and Kurt Johnston and originally appeared as part of Simply Youth Ministry Today free newsletter. Subscribe to SYM Today right here.

I (Josh) remember during one of my most painful seasons in ministry I got an email from a fellow youth pastor. The message was short and sweet – it consisted of 3 words:

“Hang in there.”

Today I’m heading into a painful meeting with a volunteer. He needs to be removed for us to move forward. I had a tough interaction with a parent who was upset about an illustration I used during our recent series on relationships. I had to call out someone for spreading gossip and hurting the unity of our church. It feels like every day this week I’ve been hit with something big or tasked with something extraordinarily difficult. What I need someone to say to me right now is, “Hang in there.”

Thankfully I’ve got some genuine cheerleaders on the sidelines of our ministry. They realize the long hours, tough conversations and painful weeks in ministry add up and, if unchecked, run you straight into burnout. I’ve heard a ton of encouraging words this week that even in a season like this – God isn’t quite done with me at this place. That even when things are tough, God is good and faithful. Remidners that He is changing lives even when the circumstances around our ministry are less than ideal.

So today, please hear this from me: Hang in there.

Fight the battles you need to fight today. Be strong where strength is needed and give in and be weak when it doesn’t really matter. Ask your mentor for prayer this week, grab coffee with a friend in your youth ministry network so you can vent and then gear up for another run.

No one said youth ministry was going to be easy. In fact, I think Jesus might have said our lives would be just the opposite.* But know that He is faithful and is building and shaping you and the people around you. I would imagine that you’re probably not done where He’s got you – that maybe you need to bloom where you’re planted, even if there is a little frost on the ground this morning.

So hang in there. And please remind me of this article the next time I’m about to quit, too.

This post was written by Josh Griffin and Kurt Johnston and originally appeared as part of Simply Youth Ministry Today free newsletter. Subscribe to SYM Today right here.

If you are a youth pastor at your church – you are stuck in the middle. Chances are, you are a few steps removed from the top leadership position (lead pastor) and probably at least one step removed from the bottom (church janitor). Is it possible to lead while being positioned like this? We think so! Here are a few suggestions that will help you have upward influence:

Honor the Decision You Disagree With
As somebody in the middle, you often get decisions handed down to you that you, in return, need to hand down to others. There’s nothing more painful and frustrating then being handed down decisions that seriously affect your world with which you had little or no input. At times it will be very tempting (and rightfully so…) to use your lack of involvement in the decision to your advantage. If it’s bad news that you are expected to communicate to others it will be easy to say, “this wasn’t my decision but…”. If you don’t like the ramifications of a decision, it will be tempting to “play dumb” and act like you misunderstood the directives because you weren’t in the room when decisions were made. Here’s the deal: If you want to be a leader, act like one! Man (or woman) up, and honor the decisions made above you and implement them in your world the way a healthy leader should.

Speak Up
Being in the middle is difficult because it isn’t always clear when your voice should be heard. Here’s what we think: speak up! Don’t interrupt your next elder meeting – but take the time to share your perspective and thoughts at inventive times. Maybe shoot a note to your senior pastor every week giving him/her an update on youth group and a better context for the decisions they will make. Just because you aren’t the #1 leader, doesn’t mean your voice isn’t important!

Support the leaders above you
Support the “old guard”. Don’t fall into the temptation to take part in “water cooler” talk that is negative. Look for opportunities to speak highly of the sr. leadership of the church. Besides, someday you’ll be the old guy up front and want to be treated the same way, too.

Shape Decisions Behind Scenes
You don’t have to be in the “important” meetings to influence decisions that are being made! Those meetings are where things get finalized, but the decisions are often made well before the formal meeting ever takes place. If something is on the table that is important to you, then figure out creative ways to make sure your input is heard. Take your boss out to coffee, and ask if you can share your thoughts on the topic. If he/she is a healthy leader, they will welcome lots of input concerning upcoming decisions they need to make.

Be a Team Player
If you really want to be taken seriously by the leaders in your church, it’s time to start caring about your church! Don’t allow yourself to only be concerned about the youth group. Look for ways to chip in and lend a hand in church-wide areas. When senior leadership sees that you care about the whole church, and not church your little area within it, you may be shocked at how quickly your influence increases.

Being stuck in the middle is never easy – but it is possible to lead from that challenging position. As a youth worker, it is something you have to expect. Lead on, friends!

This post was written by Josh Griffin and Kurt Johnston and originally appeared as part of Simply Youth Ministry Today free newsletter. Subscribe to SYM Today right here.

Kurt just posted the 3-week series arc for their series about sex in our Wildside (junior high) ministry the past month. Worth checking out for inspiration for your own series, and be sure to head over there to check out some other insights about teaching about sex/relationships to junior highers, too.

Week 1:  Developing Healthy Friendships With Each Other.  We simply took a look at some of the differences between guys and girls, and how an understanding of some of these differences can help us be better friends with each other.

Week 2:  Dating:  We took a look at what begins to happen when a friendship becomes more than just a friendship. We addressed such questions as:  When is it okay to start dating? Who should I date?  How should I date?  What role do should my parents play in all of this?

Week 3: Sex  This weekend, we will wrap the series up by talking about sex. I feel a little overwhelmed because ONE lesson on sex isn’t enough.  I am afraid I will try to cram too much into the lesson, thus making it too complex, and more confusing than helpful.

JG