special needs | More Than Dodgeball

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: #FAIL – Not Ministering to Student with Special Needs

I recently read an article called #FAIL in youth ministry and how to deal with distractions while preaching (you can read it here). Students need to understand the rules and when they don’t follow them during service, a youth leader needs to come along side and correct that behavior.

The illustration that was used in the article turns out to be a special needs student who was the distraction. Granted, the youth pastor or the leaders didn’t know about this student at the time, but the lessons learned from this situation didn’t reflect that they were a special needs student who couldn’t control their actions.

So here are some lessons that could have been learned:

1. Our youth service is not more important than people. I don’t know of very many churches that accept special needs children and their families. If they do, they are very rare. My son, who has special needs, makes all kinds of noises in church that would definitely count as a distraction, but people have grown to accept my son and love on him every time they see him. ::You should see him worship God ::

2. We can use that situation as an opportunity to teach students to love and respect everyone. Teenagers love to be in their groups that are comfortable. Let’s get them to get out of the coziness of their friends to reach out in love to these students. This is not a one time love, but it has to be shown over time.

3. After knowing that the student has special needs, why not create a buddy system for these students where a student would be with them the entirety of the youth service. It would create a sense of peace in the parents to know that someone cares about their child, and buddy would be able to help curb the response of the peers wondering what is happening.

These are just a few suggestions. I am still trying to figure out how to minister to special needs students and their families. I know that it is a huge mission field for sure. If my oldest son didn’t have the needs, I might have reacted the same way. It is my world that I live in all the time, and for a church to rally around these students would shine brightly for Jesus.

Bill Peterson is the youth pastor of Crossfire, a ministry of the Worship Center in Leesburg, VA.

5 View Comments November 14, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts Handling Disruptions in Youth Group

This week Kurt and I are going after a youth ministry fail in our lives in the past season of ministry, and sharing what we learned from the incident. You got to revel in Kurt’s mistake yesterday—here’s mine:

I was teaching a few weeks ago in youth group and during the talk we had a disruptive student. It was a little disruption at first, but a few minutes later we had a full-blown problem on our hands. A student was making all sorts of comments and noises from his seat—students were staring, whispering, and generally completely distracted by the situation. We found out later the teenager has a special medical need and didn’t have any control over what was coming out of his mouth. But the point is our team didn’t know what to do…so no one did anything.

FAIL: We weren’t ready to handle this situation. I’m left on stage trying to teach while this disruption is occurring and everyone is frozen or in a silent panic trying to figure out what to do.

LEARNING: The next week we put into place a simple 4-step process for dealing with disruptions during youth group:

1) The speaker never addresses the situation. Whoever is on stage models grace and pretends like nothing is going on. Motor through.

2) Don’t wait. Will someone else jump in? Let’s just take the “wait and see” approach to see if it gets worse. No…take action when any disruption occurs. From the giggles in the back of the room, to a full on meltdown, do something; don’t just stand there.

3) Take it outside. Ask the student to step outside of the room with you as discreetly as possible. Usually a knowing look or a fierce glare from a youth leader corrects poor behavior. When those don’t work, invite them to the exit for a talk.

4) Investigate what to do from there. Could this situation be fixed by simply reseating the person? What discipline is needed to correct this behavior? Handle each situation with incredible amounts of care and grace but balance firmness.

General rule of thumb: don’t let one ruin it for all. Where have you failed and what have you learned recently?

This post was written by Josh Griffin and Kurt Johnston and originally appeared as part of Simply Youth Ministry Today free newsletter. Subscribe to SYM Today right here. Tomorrow look for a special guest post on ministering to a student with special needs that will be helpful to unpack that area for ministry as well. In hindsight it would have been wise to use another student as an example in this post. #FAIL

5 View Comments November 13, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: Adapting Lessons for Student with Special Needs

So, how might you adapt a grade-level textbook religious education lesson for a child with special needs? Here are some handy tips to help you along the way.

Prepare

Read through the Children’s Book lesson.
Read through the Teacher Guide lesson that accompanies the Children’s Book.
Think about what you might be able to accomplish with the time you meet with the child. Can you teach the whole lesson during one session? Do you think it might take two sessions? Plan with your time-frame in mind.

Plan

Take an inventory of all of the learning tools you have, including balls, puzzles, pictures, toys, and so on. Gather the ones that might work well as you teach this grade-level Children’s Book lesson.
Allow yourself the freedom to adjust the lesson in a way that will work well with your particular student. Imagine alternative ways to share the information in the Children’s Book.
Mark up the Children’s Book and Teacher Guide with sticky notes. Record notes for yourself about what and how you want to teach this lesson. For example:

Children’s Book: Mark the pictures in the children’s book that you want to talk about with the child.
Children’s Book: Mark the articles, features, or stories that you want to paraphrase or read aloud to the child.
Teacher Guide: Mark the spots where you want to veer away from the book and do an activity.
Teacher Guide: Mark the spots where you will use learning tools to help you teach. For example, maybe you’d like to use the dolls to act out a story with the child.

In advance, gather all your materials and make any physical samples of art projects that you want the child to develop during the lesson.

Teach

When you work through the grade-level Children’s Book session with the child, consider doing the following to make the most of the lesson:

Make learning as active as possible, but in a way that will not raise the child’s anxiety.
Vary your vocal tone and volume to match the message of material you are reading aloud.
Make your face and voice congruent and match up with the content. For example when you are discussing something happy, look and sound happy.
Give the child plenty of time to respond to questions. Accept all forms of attempted communication including talking, gesturing, sign language, pointing to pictures, drawing, and so on.
Provide exact models of what you want the child to say or do.
Describe everything the child does using simple sentences.
Take breaks as needed. If a technique is working, move on.
Give verbal praise when an accomplishment or milestone has been reached.

Joellyn Cicciarelli is a national workshop presenter and the director of curricula development at Loyola Press, who oversaw and helped develop the Adaptive First Eucharist Preparation Kit and the Adaptive Reconciliation Kit.

Add Comment September 29, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: Overcoming Potential Roadblocks in Ministering to Those with Disabilities

Over the past two years, I’ve had the honor of working with parents and practitioners who minister to children and adults with disabilities. Time and time again, main themes emerge as potential roadblocks to working with those who require something a little different than your average presentation of the faith. Three themes follow, along with some wisdom I’ve gained along the way

Creating a Welcoming Environment
One common roadblock is a congregation or a class that doesn’t fully welcome an individual with special needs. Sadly, individuals or families may sometimes be turned away from attending services or classes or receiving sacraments. Here are a few tips that might help change minds and hearts so all of God’s children are welcomed in community:

Invite experts in the field of disability to speak to your audience about the importance of welcoming those with special needs. Invite speakers to emphasize that an individual with special needs does indeed have a spiritual life and should be invited to participate.
Help others use “people first” language in which words place the person before the disability, such as she has autism versus she is autistic. A simple Internet search can provide many positive examples.
Adapt spaces and seating arrangements so everyone can feel included.
Provide adaptive faith-related materials, such as The Adaptive First Eucharist Preparation Kit or The Adaptive Reconciliation Kit by Loyola Press.

Teaching to Strengths
Teaching individuals with disabilities requires us to look at each person uniquely, to identify his or her strengths, and to differentiate our approach. Try these ideas to help teach to a person’s strengths:

Talk with family members. Find out what works and what doesn’t in school and social settings. What motivates this person? What calms him or her? What causes anxiety or discomfort? What assistive materials might help this person?
Watch for feedback, facial, physical, or verbal. Being a careful observer can help you assess a person’s level of comfort or understanding.
Modify and adapt your approach. For example, if a person has a physical disability, consider presenting ideas visually or verbally. If a person has difficulty maintaining attention, make the learning hands-on and active.

Recognizing Signs of a Disability
Take some time to learn about the disabilities of those you serve. Pay attention to characteristics that might be misinterpreted as irreverence or inappropriate behavior. Chances are, these behaviors are signs of a disability. These characteristics are often signs of a disability that should be received with tolerance and compassion:

involuntary movements such as tics, tremors, or vocalizations
lack of eye contact
inability to give a verbal response or a confusion in providing a gestural response (such as shaking head no when the individual means yes)
difficulty swallowing
holding ears, pacing, or other gesture that signals sensory issues

So let’s remove the roadblocks and work together to help those with special needs experience the richness of a relationship with Jesus and with those who share their faith. We all have different abilities. We are all needed. We are all valued.

Joellyn Cicciarelli is a national workshop presenter and the director of curricula development at Loyola Press, who oversaw and helped develop the Adaptive First Eucharist Preparation Kit and the Adaptive Reconciliation Kit.

1 View Comments September 15, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: How Do You Approach Special Needs In Ministry?

If every teen you ministered to were the same, life would be easy. But, each person that walks in through the door is different. They are different by things in and out of their control and when you can embrace what makes them unique it will lead to some dynamic and powerful ministry.

Chances are there is at least one family in your church with a child who has special needs. It can be an intimidating situation to approach because it’s something you’ve never prepared for facing. You are conflicted because you want people to know that you are loving and open; however, you also don’t want to disrupt the flow of how you do ministry.

I’ve been blessed to have ministers and a coworker with a special needs educational background who have shown and challenged me in creating capacity for special needs in ministry. Three pieces of advice that they have shared with me is to:

Find People With Passion – You care for special needs teens just as you care for any teen that walks in through your door; however, there are people in your community who are passionate for them. What you want to do is plug these adults into your ministry as small group leaders or mentors. Have them bridge the gap and kill any stereotypes or suspicions that the teens or other adults might have. Pick their brains and learn from them so that you can be more educated on the subject.

Be Inclusive – Certain special needs provide certain limits; however, that should not prevent you from inviting them to be a part of your ministry. If they are high functioning you really won’t notice much of a difference. If they do require assistance ask their parent or another minister to give them direct support. Either way don’t close them out because it’s complicated, embrace the relationship and allow God to lead.

Communicate With Parents – Every parent (whether of special needs or not) wants their child to fit in. When you talk to the parent of a special needs child, chances are they will want to work with you because they want what is best for their kid. Allow them to give you wisdom on their situation and insight on how to handle other teens. Learn what might trigger their teen to be more comfortable or distracted. Get to know their individual child so that you know how to best serve and guide them.

How you minister to that child and their family will depend on what the need is, who the parents are and what resources you have available. But, if you truly want to be a ministry for Christ you need to make sure it’s filled with God’s unconditional and accepting love. It might be a challenge to have special needs in your ministry; however, it’ll only make you better.

How are you approaching special needs in your ministry? If you aren’t why?

Chris Wesley is the Director of Student Ministry at Church of the Nativity in Timonium, MD. You can read more about his ministry and life on his excellent blog Marathon Youth Ministry.

1 View Comments June 29, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: Love and Serve Students With Special Needs

A few years ago, my wife Jennifer and I were asked to organize and lead a one-day children’s and youth ministry training for churches in our state that were part of our denomination. We invited a few speakers to lead different seminars throughout the day for both volunteers and staff members from local churches. My wife–who has a degree in human development and extensive experience working with kids and adults with developmental disabilities–led a seminar at the end of the day on how to minister to kids with special needs. During the break before that last seminar, a group from a church that had traveled a few hours for the training packed up to get a jump on their trip home. They explained that they didn’t need to attend the last seminar anyways, because they didn’t have any kids in their church who were developmentally disabled.

My wife handled the conversation very graciously, even though she can be quite passionate about caring for people with special needs. On the inside, however, she was thinking, maybe there’s a REASON you don’t have any kids with special needs! It’s very possible that a family may have visited their church, but left after one Sunday (or even before church was over!) because it was very clear that church would not be a good environment for their autistic or developmentally disabled child or teenager. In fact, it may be that a family has visited your church, but did not stay because they didn’t feel like it wouldn’t be a good place for their special needs teenager.

Not every church or youth ministry of any size is able to perfectly accommodate and minister to any special need teenager that walks through their doors. However, there are a few things every church can–and should–do to be ready to love and serve students with special needs. Here’s a quick list:

Be ready to serve. A teenager with special needs and her family will be able to tell right off the bat if your church and youth ministry is willing to serve them or not. While you and I both know that a teenager with special needs matters just as much to God as anyone else, most special needs kids are treated as an outcast in one or more areas of their lives. And what did Jesus do with people that the world mistreated? He loved them with open arms. You may not be a doctor or have a degree in human development, but anyone can serve by welcoming someone with open arms.

Educate yourself about different kinds of disabilities. Thankfully, my wife is a walking library of how to serve kids with autism, Down syndrome, and other special needs, and she answers a ton of my questions. Find a good book on the topic, or better yet, get to know a special education teacher in your church. You don’t have to be an expert, but a little understanding can help you be a better youth worker to kids with special needs.

Show a little grace to parents. Before they found their way to your church, chances are that the parents of a special needs teenager have had less-than-ideal experiences in how schools, churches, or other organizations have treated their son or daughter. So, if a parent has a few more questions than you’re used to, or if they seem to be checking up on you a lot, that’s okay. They’re just trying to make sure their son or daughter is being taken care of.

Help them know Jesus. If the Bible is to believed, then God wants every human being to be reconciled to him through a relationship with Jesus (1 Timothy 2:4). The last time I checked, an IQ test was not a biblical requirement for learning about Jesus. If you take the extra time to help someone who might have a developmental delay or cognitive disability to know Jesus, you’re being faithful as a youth worker. One of the highlights of career as a youth pastor has been baptizing a special needs student who was more excited than anyone I’ve ever known to be baptized.

Integrate them into the ministry wherever possible. The answer to helping a group of special needs teenagers is not to give them their own small group. Help them be a part of your family by actually making them a part of your family. Get them in a small group. Let them lead in some way. Pair them up with another student to help them have a great time during your large group gathering.

Be flexible. Be willing to go out of your way to help a special needs teenager attend a retreat or be a part of a small group. You might even need to make an exception to one of your rules. Parents of special needs kids are used to being told “no” when it comes to things their kids can do. Go out of your way to find a way to able to tell them “yes.”

Remember, you don’t have to be an expert on working with teenagers with special needs to be able to make your youth ministry a welcoming place for them. You just need to be willing to serve and go the extra mile.

Benjer McVeigh serves as a pastor to students at Washington Heights Church in Ogden, Utah. He resides in Ogden with his wife, Jennifer, and his two daughters, Bethany and Samantha. He blogs at www.BenjerMcVeigh .com.

7 View Comments April 22, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts Clip from HSM’s Senior Weekend

Shell Eastman is one of HSM’s graduating seniors who deals with Cerebral Palsy that causes her to limp significantly. She talked during our Senior Weekend how her disability and suffering helped her to see and begin to understand God’s love. Enjoy the clip – good, good stuff. SO proud of her.

JG

Add Comment June 22, 2011

Josh GriffinMore Posts Simply Youth Ministry Podcast: Episode 156

Its that time again. Doug Fields, Matt McGill, Katie Edwards, and Josh Griffin are here to answer your questions. After a discussion of Cracker Barrel Diners, Drive Thru and Dash (Doug almost got it right), and other places to eat while traveling, the gang jumps into your questions. Topics include: A special needs followup, new believers as volunteers, volunteer motivation, adding to your job description, family ministry, steak dinners, students attending multiple youth groups, and whats most vital in your ministry.

JG