spiritual health | More Than Dodgeball

Chris WesleyMore Posts How To Build Youth Ministry Endurance

This past weekend thousands of youth ministers participated in the Simply Youth Ministry Conference. As a participant in the past few I know that feelings of empowerment and encouragement are flowing through this years attendees minds and souls. The reason these conferences can be such a powerful experience is because of the camaraderie and the opportunity to take a youth ministry “Time Out”.

The problem with a conference like Simply Youth Ministry is that it’s only a weekend. After a weekend of euphoria you are forced to go home and face:

That hurting teen.
A pastor you clash with.
An angry parent.
A semi committed ministry team.

Youth ministry is filled with hills and valleys. It’s like a long run with no end in site. The only way to get through it is ONE STEP AT A TIME. To endure in this emotional, exhausting and journey that you and I call youth ministry you need to make sure you:

Network With Other Youth Workers: You can connect with these men and women at conferences, speak with your pastor or visit sites like the National Network of Youth Ministry. Build relationships with men and women who know what you are facing.

Set-up Limits: This means creating a schedule that protects your time at home and what is most important at work. It also means learning how to say “No” even if the opportunity seems incredible. Work within your limits and see how God will bless you.

Seek Personal Accountability: Find men or women in your church that you can meet with to talk about life, share goals and call you out when you are straying from what’s important. If you don’t know where to start, talk to your pastor, ask fellow youth workers or talk with one of your volunteers to recommend people.

Embrace The Moments: Everything that is good in your ministry is significant. When a teen invites a friend, quotes something from your message on Twitter or testifies in front of their peers, remember it. For all the bad in youth ministry there is so much good. As youth ministers you need to celebrate and share it with your coworkers, volunteers, parents, teens and other youth workers. It’ll remind you why what you do is worth it.

Observe A Sabbath: As a youth worker you need to find other ways of embracing the Sabbath outside of Sundays. While you might be at church it’s still easy to mix work with worship. Take a day where you spend it quietly with God or join a prayer group not associated with your church. If you can’t connect with God you’ll make yourself more exposed to Satan’s tricks.

Youth ministry is a battle because you are dealing with changing lives and relationships. To truly survive and thrive you need to rely on God’s strength and love. Invest in people who will invest in you and keep moving one step at a time. Your work, dedication and heart for the next generation is priceless, fuel it.

How do you endure the long haul of youth ministry?

Chris Wesley (@chrisrwesley)

2 View Comments March 5, 2013

Chris WesleyMore Posts How To Know When You Are Doing Too Much

My wife and I used to live in this awesome apartment in midtown Baltimore. One evening we had just come back from the grocery store faced with a dilemma. We were faced with carrying a large amount of grocery bags from our car to our apartment (On the 4th floor) in one trip. The reason we needed to do it in one trip is because there were no more spots in the apartment parking lot and it was too late at night to leave anything of value in the car .

So we attempted to do the impossible. As we unloaded the car our bags began to tear, so we decided to move quicker; however, they kept tearing. We picked up our pace, thinking we could make it to at least inside the building when suddenly everything spilled onto the pavement. Disaster struck because we thought we could handle the load. Nope, we were carrying too much.

There are times in youth ministry when you think you can handle the load. Unfortunately, responsibilities pile on top of one another, the weight gets heavier and next thing you know everything is just spilling everywhere. You’ve lost control of your ministry. Unfortunately, it’s not always easy to recognize when you are doing too much until it’s too late. While it is difficult to recognize there are a few signs. For example, you know you are doing too much when you:

Do Not Sleep Well
Work Longer With Less Productivity
Feel More Irritable
Keep Disappointing Others

It’s when you start seeing these results that you need to sit down (Even if you feel like you don’t have time) and:

Map Out An Ideal Schedule: You are working and living in chaos because you are lacking a vision for your ministry. Even if it doesn’t seem likely you need a plan that will help you manage your time and responsibilities. Plan each day and include everything, even your lunch breaks. If you had total control over your schedule what would it look like?

Build Guardrails: You’ve gone off the deep end because you didn’t have anyone or thing to warn you that you were too close to the edge. Find people who know your schedule to keep you accountable. Go back to your schedule and set a time when you review your commitments. If you get paranoid about doing too much, good, you are on the right path.

Know The Word “No”: One of the largest reasons you do too much is because you don’t know how to say, “NO”. Granted you might say it to others; however, how are you at saying it to yourself? Even if an opportunity looks good, if you cannot handle it, if you are unsure about it’s expectations caution on the side of not doing it. If you aren’t a fan of saying, “No.” in fear of missing out on something big, build up the confidence to say, “Let me think about it.”

If you do too much you’ll burn out of ministry. Knowing when you are doing too much is key to longevity and health in ministry. Set-up a system that protects you and has you focused on why it is you do ministry.

How do you safeguard against doing too much?

Chris Wesley (@chrisrwesley)

Add Comment January 17, 2013

Josh GriffinMore Posts Reflections from a Summer Intern

Here are a few reflections as a summer intern in the High School Ministry at Saddleback Church:

5. DO get close with co-workers and focus on them more than on projects. I saw the valuable teaching role that people have in my life through this internship. I remember one day specifically, I had a lot of articles to edit and the pressure was weighing down on me, when a coworker asked me if I wanted to go to lunch with her. Everything in me said that I should focus on my work and say no, but for some reason I agreed, and it was such a great conversation about life in ministry and what I’m learning through interning. She gave me lots of great advice and it made working with her on projects such a bigger joy. My editing got done and I actually had a clearer head while doing it.

4. DO hard things. I knew that taking on the magazine would be a large workload, but I took it on knowing it would stretch me as a journalist. Boy, did it ever! Not only do I feel more prepared to be Features editor of the Biola University’s Newspaper in the coming semester, I also feel better prepared to have a career in this field. Organizing and leading a team was a challenge because of my lack of experience, but navigating that has been such an area of growth for my problem-solving and leadership abilities.

3. DO communicate as much as possible with coworkers. I wrote in one of my journals for the class that I was having trouble with the graphic designer for the magazine. I was hoping to see some layouts a few weeks ago, and he didn’t show me any for the longest time. If I had clarified in the beginning that I was expecting to see layouts BEFORE deadline to know that he was making progress, we wouldn’t have any problem because we could have had a conversation about what both of our expectations were. However, since that conversation never happened, there was a long period of mystery and uncertainty regarding when he was going to show me any work. It was frustrating for me and didn’t get me anywhere because I didn’t express it to him, so he had no idea that I was annoyed. I could have saved myself a lot of time worrying if I had just talked to him upfront!

2. DON’T be “above” anything. This is a lesson that I have discussed before, and one that was daily reinforced by the staff. Refusing to do something (or doing it with a poor attitude) because it’s not what you’re passionate about displays an entitled sense of self. Interning is about learning through experience, and certainly God can teach us through tasks beyond our specific calling or role. I learned a lot cleaning out a closet (like how much easier it is to do things with a team, and how to serve others, and how one person’s sour attitude can spoil it for everyone, and how giant cardboard iPhones should never be kept because they take up way too much space).

1. DO take time to reflect, breathe, and commune with God. My stress level during this internship was directly related to the time I spent with God. The days when I was most stressed were the days I skipped time with the Lord, and that negatively affected how I handled myself and navigated conflict at work. Without daily time with God, I can become irritable and closed off. With daily time with God, I have a better view on what’s important and find a lot more joy in what I’m doing and who I am. He is key. Success is nothing if God is merely an afterthought.

Heather Leith is an incredible summer intern on the HSM Team. Follow her semi-annual Tweets at https://twitter.com/heatherleithal.

Add Comment July 17, 2012

Geoff StewartMore Posts Guest Post: Admitting You’ve Fallen off the Wagon

This week I realized I have done something no christian leader wants to admit, I fell off the personal devotional wagon. Now I am not saying I haven’t been involved with scripture, quite the opposite actually. I have done something I believe lots of other leaders do, started reading my ministry into everything.

Now I will be the first to admit, that a HUGE part of ones job when they teach is to spend time in the Word solely for the purpose of teaching, but sometimes we forget that we need to spend time in the Word for ourselves. We need to be in there digging and learning for our own walk with God.

That’s what has happened to me, so how am I going to fix it? I have decided to spend some time in my journal, I will also listen to some worship music. I am going to turn off my phone, my laptop and my tv. I am going to go into solitude. I am going to sit and be still (something I don’t do well) and I am going to read my Bible for what God wants to teach me.

Now one thing I have started to do is have a Bible I just use to read for myself out of. This might seem crazy and perhaps even expensive because I already have so many Bibles, but I find if I don’t keep things separate I don’t shut off easily. So I will use that Bible, not my iPhone, study Bible or teaching Bible for my reading.

I don’t know about everyone, but one thing I know is if I do this there are a lot of others out there who fall off the wagon. So how do you stay on the wagon? What are you doing to keep up with your PERSONAL devotional time?

Kyle Corbin has been serving youth as a volunteer or pastor for over 10 years. He is currently the youth pastor at the Bridge Church in North Vancouver B.C. and blogs here and you can follow him on Twitter @CorbinKyle

Add Comment July 1, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts Love God, Love Students

Today we hit on the foundation of good youth ministry: Love God, love students.

Love God 
This is the first love—our hearts must be centered and aligned with his in order to do genuine and effective ministry. You can fake it, but frauds are always found out. A counterfeit youth pastor won’t make it long-term—and the key to being genuine is to be in a genuine, daily walk with The Father. We all endure seasons of spiritual dryness, but make sure it’s the rare interlude to sincere spiritual health. Remember, you’re discipling your students with your life; make sure it’s centered in the right place.

THIS WEEK: Take a little time to evaluate your spiritual health. Usually, you instinctively know where you currently stand, so don’t try to talk yourself out of your gut reaction. There is nothing more important in your life/office/to-do list than your walk with Jesus. Ask your supervisor for a spiritual retreat day. Call up a mentor and savor the wisdom in his or her words. Eat a meal alone. Talk to the person who is draining you, or finally have that conversation you’ve been dreading that’s been distracting you from truly loving God. Love Jesus more than you love youth ministry.

Love Students 
For most, this comes pretty easy…it’s the reason you got into this gig—but at times students can be needy or draining. When spending time with students suddenly feels tough, fight through the temptation to focus on tasks and be constrained to your church office. Get out and be with students. We’ve both discovered through the years that the very best way to stay in love with students is to simply be around them!

THIS WEEK: Adjust your schedule to spend a little more time with students. Linger in a conversation with a student you would normally brush off. Look for opportunities to show up in a big way for a family in need.

This post was written by Josh Griffin and Kurt Johnston and originally appeared as part of Simply Youth Ministry Today free newsletter. Subscribe to SYM Today right here.

3 View Comments April 26, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts As For Me and My [Crazy] House by Brian Berry

Beyond excited to get my hands on Brian Berry’s first book - As For Me and My [Crazy] House. Looks so perfect for youth workers with growing families. As a father of 4, I can relate. Can I get an amen?

Serving in Christian ministry should be a life-building, life-giving, life-inspiring experience for leaders, spouses, and families. So why isn’t that always the case? In this book, youth pastor Brian Berry pours out his thoughts on why it’s so tough to build a healthy life, a healthy marriage, and a healthy family in the midst of ministry craziness. He focuses on the three best gifts you as a youth worker can bestow:

The best gift you can give your marriage is a healthy self

The best gift you can give your family is a healthy marriage

The best gift you can give your community and ministry is a healthy family

JG

2 View Comments February 6, 2012

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: 3 Dangers from Exposing Your Students to Spiritual Danger

Danger: Trusting everything a student tells you. I know most dads want to think the very best about their student. So, for example, if (insert your student’s name) says that they are reading their Bible, most dads take that for face value. When what the student really may be saying is that they are spending one minute looking at the Bible so that they can tell their dad they are reading their Bible.

Solution: Actually engage your student in conversation. Talk with them. Ask questions. Probe the statement they are making. In every arena. Not just Bible reading, but talk with about school, and other activities. Take time to go have Starbucks, cast a line, or go for a drive time and really talk to them. They need it. You need it! This is a form of spiritual protection…knowing about your student.

Danger: Spiritual health is just another aspect of our busy life. Corporate worship, Christian fellowship, and Christian accountability are just other items on our long list of things that we do. In fact, we typically do those things when we don’t have anything else to do (homework, sports practices/games, family trips, attending sporting events, etc…). Students are taught through this behavior that spiritual health is something that we are ultimately concerned with when we have nothing else to do.

Solution: Make spiritual health a priority for your family and its members. Don’t miss corporate worship. Don’t allow your students to make excuses for missing church (i.e. no one else is going, I have too much homework, I have a game, etc..) There are certainly occasions when families miss church (which should be rare). The idea is to promote the importance of Christian fellowship and accountability. When you are forced to be out of town as a family, find a church to attend on Sunday mornings. Communicate to your students that they cannot be involved in extracurricular activities that draw you as a family away from church by playing/performing on Sundays. This reinforces the fact that our spiritual health is the ultimate priority in your family. This too is spiritual protection!

Danger: Tell them what they should be doing, but don’t model it in your own life. They need to see it in you! When is the last time your students saw you tell yourself “No” to something? Yes, you tell them no to things (which by the way is, in many cases, the right thing to do), but they never see you telling yourself “no” for the sake of the gospel and glory of the Lord. In my opinion, this is the greatest exposure to spiritual danger for students. A hypocrite. If there is one thing that a student can recognize and see instantly it’s a hypocrite. Satan can use that to either push them totally away from the faith or damage their faith significantly.

Solution: Students need genuineness. They need to see you talk a big game and live a big game for Christ. They need you to be open and honest with them. They need to know areas in which you struggle and when you mess up (you will!) they need you to man up to your mistakes, ask the Lord and your family for forgiveness, and commit to doing better for the glory of God. Too many dads either don’t allow their students to see who they really are (which makes them hypocrites in the eyes of their students) or they simply aren’t really who they say they are (which is the definition of a hypocrite).

Tony Richmond is the High School Pastor at First Baptist Church Keller in Keller, Texas.

Add Comment November 19, 2011

Josh GriffinMore Posts GUEST POST: Capital Letters

I have a problem. Okay, maybe problem is too strong of a word.

Issue. There we go, I have an issue. Although not a detrimental one, but an issue none the less.

I constantly capitalize random letters.

I know you’re thinking to yourself right now “Oh My Word! We need to get that guy an intervention” And while it is not a problem that causes any real issue, it is really really annoying.

The sad part is, I don’t even realize that I do it. I do realize that I intentionally capitalize some words for emphasis, such as God or Youth Worker, but more often than not I find myself capitalizing random words like Outside or Yourself. This may seem like a boring topic to talk about, but I promise it will all make sense in a little bit. In terms of grammar, we are taught that we capitalize proper nouns. David, California, and Chick-fil-a. We capitalize the terms that are not run of the mill terms. We capitalize terms that are big deals.

So in essence, when I capitalize the first letter of a word it is the same as saying “Hey look! This is important! This is a big deal”

I have to be careful that I don’t unintentionally capitalize words and phrases that were never intended to be, thus making them a bigger deal than they are. As a Youth Worker, I have to be careful that I don’t do the same thing in how I lead my local Student Ministry.

There are going to be issues and problems that arise in your Student Ministry regardless of how well or how poorly that it is run. That is a fact. Write it down or tuck it away in the back of your mind, because you WILL encounter issues as a Youth Worker. You will have to make tough decisions. You will have struggles. That is just an occupational hazard.

The question you need to as yourself as you lead your Student Ministry is simply this: What will I capitalize and what will I lower-case? Or better yet “What will I make a big deal out of and what will I let go?”

Do you capitalize “Numerical Growth” and minimize “Spiritual Growth”?
Do you capitalize “Fun” and minimize “Spirituality”?
Do you capitalize “What I don’t have” and minimize “What I do have”?
Do you capitalize “What others think” and minimize “What God thinks”?
Do you capitalize “Lack of budget” and minimize “God will provide”?
Do you capitalize “My Students aren’t getting it” and minimize “It’s sinking in”?

What are you making a bigger deal out of than you should? What are you capitalizing that God is wanting to be lowercase and what are you making lowercase that He wants you to capitalize? I had this teacher in high school named Ms. Holt. I don’t remember much about her, but I do remember that she would always give me a hard time when I would accidentally capitalize words that shouldn’t be. Every time I turned in a paper, I would usually get it back with some red marks from my teacher showing where I had capitalized words that I shouldn’t have. It became almost laughable at the shear volume of red marks that would be on my paper when I got it back after being graded.

I wonder sometimes if God looks at us with a red ink pen in hand. Not to correct us or make us feel like we’re doing wrong, but so that He can look at our lives and mark the places that we allow some things to be bigger deals than they actually are. Where we capitalize things that should be lower case. The truth of the matter is that when God looks at you as a Youth Worker and at what you and your local ministry can accomplish, He sees a capital letter.

You may capitalize Doubt, Fear, Insecurity and Ignorance, but He looks at those as lowercase letters compared to what He can accomplish through you. Your mission, your vision, and the ultimate destination for your Student Ministry is a capital letter in His eyes. That thing that you have been fighting and may still be struggling with that you have capitalized is just a lowercase letter in the eyes of God.

He is able to take those things that are big problems in your local setting and make them not such big problems anymore. Those big issues that you don’t see how they can be fixed He can make smaller. Those big circumstances that you don’t quite know how to navigate, He can lead you through. So what are you facing right now in your Student Ministry that you need Jesus to lowercase? Now, if you will excuse me, it’s time to check this post and see if I randomly capitalized any words again.

Noah Watt serves as the Student Pastor at Lone Star Church in Madisonville, KY. When not hanging out with his wife Bethany, Noah can be found hanging out with the coolest group of Students on the planet, reading or writing on his blog, “The Backstage Project”, at www.whatihavelearnedbackstage.wordpress.com